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Insubordination
M.: Where are we?
O.: I think...I think we're right -- here. Right here. See, cause here's the embankment and there's the joint in the river, and over here is the base camp. We're right here.
M.: How can you tell? It's all brown and blue lines.
O.: Trust me, soldier. We're right here.
M.: I'm just askin, man, cause I don't see how you can look at an aerial map and see an eight-foot embankment, you know?
O.: Look, do I ever question your decisions?
M.:
O.: So don't question mine. Got me? We're right here. ... Now, what we're gonna do, we're gonna head this way -- east -- through the river bed as quiet as we can, and we're gonna hump it north two miles to base camp. Easy as pie. Slick as a cheerleader's --
M.: What do you mean, quiet as we can? Why's it matter?
O.: See this big red splotch here?
M.: (nods)
O.: Enemy territory. And not just enemy territory, but hostile enemy territory. You get me?
M.: That red spot is really, really big.
O.: It's enemy territory in a foreign country. Of course it's big.
M.: I mean, like the size of Oklahoma.
O.: No, it's not that big.
M.: Look, the base camp you're taking us to is in the red area.
O.: No, it's not.
M.: It is, too.
O.: Look, this map was shot at like ninety thousand feet or something, so of course everything looks closer. We get to the camp, you'll see.
M.: So really the camp could be like forty-five miles from us.
O.: No, it's two miles.
M.: But you can't be sure, right? Because everything looks closer.
O.:
M.: I'm just saying.
O.: Look, what we're gonna do is, we're gonna jog up this river a little ways east then cut north, okay? Like a football play.
M.: I'm just saying that a little ways on the map might be a lotta ways on the ground. Shouldn't we just call for air extraction?
O.: No.
M.: Look, it's easier. Plus we'll be home for dinner. Tonight's roast.
O.: Look, you listen to me: I call the shots. You obey my orders. That's why there's a chain of command, okay? You get me. Private?
M.:
O.: Fine, then. Let's go.
M.: Respectfully decline, sir.
O.: What?
M.: I prefer to call for an air extraction.
O.: I am the commander here. Are you defying my authority?
M.: I just think that camp is probably forty-five miles away, sir, instead of two.
O.:
M.: I'm going to --
O.: Fine, private. We'll call for an air extraction. And when we get back I'm having you cited for a disciplinary infraction.
M.: Sir. Yes, sir.
O.: Base camp, this is O., calling for air extraction from field location.
B.: What's your location, O.?
O.: Location, location. Base, we're...in the river bed just past the joint-curve.
B.: Say again?
O.: We're --
M.: Base, this is M. We're at 14 degrees lat by 213 long.
B.: Copy that. We'll have you boys out in ten.
O.: What'd you do that for?
M.: Sorry, sir.
O.: I oughta: (kicks dirt)
M.: Yes, sir.
O.: When we get back, I swear: (punches palm)
M.: Of course, sir.
O.: Now we gotta wait ten whole minutes.
M.: Better ten minutes than six days, sir.
O.: If I were a judge, M., I swear I'd hold you in contempt.
M.: Right, sir.
O.:
M.:
O.:
M.:
O.:
M.:
O.:
M.: Chopper's here, sir.
O.: Bout time, grunt. Okay, you hoist up first and I'll follow.
M.: Sir, yes, sir.
O.: Hurry up, now.
M.:
O.:
M.: I'm in, pilot.
P.: Good. Let's get out of here. We're getting reports from base camp that the enemy is heating up their fighters.
M.: Come on, sir! Hurry up, sir.
O.: (grunts)
M.: Should I give you a hand, sir?
O.: (mutters)
M.: Glad you could make it, sir.
O.: Shut up, private.
P.: We're hoofing it back, so hold on. Take a good hand on something -- there's gonna be shooting.
O.: Shooting?
M.: Enemy fighters, sir.
P.: Very hot zone here, sir.
O.: Oh.
M.: Pilot, can you tell us how far it is to base camp?
O.: (glares)
P.: Take us about ten minutes, give or take.
M.: At what speed is that?
P.: One-twenty-nine, soldier. But the ten minutes are for evasive flight, so we don't flyby U.N. peace zones.
M.: How far to base, then, would you say?
P.: Oh, forty-one miles, give or take.
O.: Pilot, radio base to have the MP waiting on the tarmac, if you would.
P.: Sir? The MPs?
O.: Yes, sir.
M.:
P.:
O.: Wipe those grins off of your faces, soldiers.
P.: Watch it!
O.: (yells)
M.: Oh, (censored).
P.: You boys good back there? That hot rocket was awful close.
M.: Oh, (censored).
P.: Soldier? Sir?
M.: Um. Take a gander below you, pilot.
P.: (censored). He fell out?
M.: He fell out.
P.: I can't land here.
M.: Yep, I know that.
P.: Huh.
M.: You radio for those MPs yet?
P.: Nah.
M.: Thanks.
P.: Welcome. I'll call for a medivac instead.
M.: You could wait a few minutes if you want to.
P.: Yeah, I think I might.
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